Monday, May 31

Spring Term (take 2).




"Oh yes." Beth's brain peered more closely at the computer. Beth saw herself reflected in the screen. "But how to get past this? This project cannot be procrastinated, worked on in groups, vanished, parted, scooped up, or siphoned away, nor can it be transfigured, charmed or otherwise made to change it's nature."
Almost absentmindedly, Beth's brain placed her hands on the keyboard.
"I can only conclude that this project is supposed to be completed."
"What?" said Beth. "No!"
"Yes, I think so: Only by completing it can I get past the project and end the term."
"But what if - what if it kills you?"
"Oh, I doubt that it would work like that," said Beth's brain easily. "Our professor would not want to kill the person who approached this task."
Beth couldn't believe it. Was this more of her brain's insane determination to see good in everyone?
"Brain," said Beth, trying to keep her voice reasonable, "brain, this is our professor we're-"
"I'm sorry, Beth; I should have said, she would not want to immediately kill the person who approached this task," Beth's brain corrected itself. "She would want to keep them alive long enough to find out how they managed to penetrate so far through her course and, most importantly of all, why they were so intent upon completing this project. Do not forget that our professor believes that she alone knows about passing a class."
Beth made to speak again, but this time her brain silenced her, frowning slightly at the silver surface of the keyboard, evidently thinking hard.
"Undoubtedly," it said, finally, "this project must act in a way that will prevent me from functioning. It might paralyze me, cause me to forget what I am here for, create so much pain I am distracted, or render me incapable in some other way. This being the case, Beth, it will be your job to make sure I keep working, even if you have to force the information into me and onto this screen. You understand?"
Beth didn't speak. Was this why she had even taken classes into spring? So that she could force-feed her brain with information that she would undoubtably never use?
"You remember," said Beth's brain, "the condition on which I let us take this class?
Beth hesitated, looking again at the computer.
"But what if-?"
"You swore, did you not, to follow any instruction I gave you?"
"Yes, but-"
"I warned you, did I not, that there might be danger?"
"Yes," said Beth, "but-"
"Well, then," said Beth's brain, edging her fingers again towards the keys, "you have my orders."

Thursday, May 27

Ode To My One True Love

Oh Macaroni,
Your cheesy goodness always
brings me so much joy.

Wednesday, May 26

Carrying Water

My BOM professor-of-last-semester left something very dear with me. Through one of his project/paper things I got into the habit of praying to better understand doctrine, and of making such doctrines a matter of consistant thought. Like... if I was having trouble being patient (for example. I mean... I'm not impatient AT ALL. ;) I'd pray for patience, study for patience, and - usually - this tended to reap startlingly specific results. This focusing-process has brought me great peace over the last few months - particularly about my future. Regardless, today I had a sweet experience I'd like to share.

Lately my "doctrine of choice" has been the Atonement. I have to admit, the atonement is one I have trouble with. I believe it to be true, and I'm grateful for it, but I've never truly felt it's affects. I've never 'sinned' greatly, and never been able to pinpoint an experience in my life that I could trace to the Atonement and to better my testimony of it. (And now you're all waiting for me to confess a grievous sin, yes?)

I'll be honest, the last week or two of this semester have been some of the most difficult times I've had in years. Due to overload and - I imagine - hormones, I've been lonely, sick, stressed, etc etc. Those weeks happen, and I accept it. In fact, contrary to previous reactions, instead of holing up and being sad, I've managed to keep myself out in the open, trying to help my friends and figuring out life. So I've dealt better with this last while than I think I ever have a hard time. Like... ever.



Anyways, on my mail run one of my duties is to carry water to the dispensers around the KMC. (You know, the big blue jugs?) These are reasonably heavy, but I can comfortably carry one and - for a few feet - two. (I'm such a wimp...) Today I loaded up my cart with seven or so and began to tote them around for dispersal to the four dispensers in the building. I brought the last two to the stairs and glanced up them with a sigh. I wasn't extremely anxious to haul the water up them - particularly since I have a headache/sore back from (I think) carrying too many books and such around this morning. Just then a middle-aged man came down the stairs. He paused, looked at me a bit cynically, and asked what I was doing with the water. I'm pretty used to having older male individuals around the KMC look disapprovingly on as I decline their offers of help and haul the water up myself. I prepared myself for a similar experience and, with a smile, explained that- like every day- I was carrying them upstairs. He came towards me, glanced at the water and then looked me in the eye. He must've seen some sort of desperation or pain or whatever, because a gentle smile passed over his face, and he said quietly: "I know you're fully capable of carrying these yourself. But would you like any help? I wouldn't want my wife to carry these."

A moment later he was carrying one up the stairs, me following behind with second. After we had distributed them, I thanked him quickly and went to hide in the bathroom and sob. I don't know what had come over me. But this man - for whatever reasons of his own - had brought profound gratitude into my heart. I felt Heavenly Father's love through the kind deed of this man and I wanted immediately to show that love to someone else in need.

I'd entreat everyone reading this to do something for the next person you encounter - whether a good act or a soft word. The Atonement gave Christ the knowledge and experience necessary to bear our burdens - we are never alone in our experiences. Don't just accept this knowledge, but live it - look for it in your own life and - through such charitable tender mercies as the one shown me this morning - try to touch others and remind them of Christ's unchanging love.

Sunday, May 23

Spring Term

So I finally figured out what was wrong with my blogging-reader-thing and now I can read all the blogs I've been missing out on. :) I particularly enjoyed Groslandia's tabloid description of her classes, so I am going to do one of my own! (*cue groaning audience*) Unfortunately I have no excuse for not posting besides my life is routine... but that's not news, is it?

Much to my distress, unlike Grosland (who is taking spring classes to get a hard class out of the way) I am indeed taking Spring because I just... can't get enough of school... LOL. That and I want to have as much done as possible before I go on my hypothetical mission next winter. But really... I like summer and all but only for a week or so... then I want school again very badly. Not to say I won't complain the whole way through... but I'd be whining either way (whether about how bored I am or about how busy I am) so I might as well be productive while I whine.

I'm sure after that dialogue you all want desperately to read on. ;)

Latin Ballroom
Okay, we all know what a freak I am for ballroom... watching it, that is. BYU ballroom classes are pretty much impossible to get into if you're female and not a senior. So when I saw a spot in the ballroom class I signed up then and there. Naturally, its LATIN and not standard. I've learned a few things in this class (besides dancing which - despite stepping on my OWN toes with high heeled shoes and getting my toes stepped on by most apologetic men - is pretty much epic.) Firstly, if you make it lightly clear that you aren't interested, most guys will - thank HEAVENS - leave you alone. Secondly, guys can indeed "move their hips" when they are very theoretically and carefully shown how. (Their astonished expressions as they view themselves in the mirror never fail to make my day.) And lastly, if you go work out for an hour and then swim for another hour EVERY MORNING at five, you'll look like you are 25 forever.
...
Okay, I didn't learn this firsthand. But my instructor basically does just that. He's like... 40 and we all thought he was a student teacher. Talk about disappointing. ;)

Chem 101
Haderlie was right. EVERYTHING he mentioned haughtily about chem in college was absolutely true. I'm just throwing that out there. This class is probably my favorite - simply because I'm simply relearning chemistry - which I incidentally love, despite my worrisome inability. It's a large class, so there isn't much person-to-person interaction besides the "experimental lab" we're required to do outside of class. I was immediately adopted the first day by a girl sitting next to me. "Sarah" - thank the heavens - reached out to my poor anti-social self and worked out a regular time during the week when we could do the lab. Otherwise... not much to say. Besides demonstrations get a lot more exciting in college than they were in high school... (think bright orange foam.)

Landscape Graphics
What can I say? I've found my calling. ;) Just kidding, but seriously, I love every moment of this class. It's like if you too architectural drafting and threw it in with an art class. All the planning and none of the strict guidelines! I'm so lazy... anyways, this class is brought to you by 'learning to draw trees from above' and 'buying a set of markers for $70.00'. We basically learn the artistic/technical aspects of landscape plan presentations. It's a bit of a project-heavy class, but it's the kind of project that you look forward to, so I have no problem with that...

Western Humanities
This is the class that I am - right now - procrastinating homework for. Yay! We all know my history complex (meaning I love to learn it and such but I despise writing about it) and humanities is no different. This class is most entertaining because it's an artistically focused class about many of the civilizations I studied last year in my Ancient Near Eastern History class. Putting faces to names and names to faces... it's really satisfying! Anyways, my teacher just recently graduated with a (masters?). She's not extremely young, has several kids, and I guess decided to return to college. (Gives me hope for the future, eh?) She is - like most history majors, I'm beginning to think - passionate about her studies. She loves this class and loves the subject. But I think she's taking the fact that she only has two months to cover it out on us in the form of reading. This class is just dripping with reading and - with 5.5 other credits, it's taking a chunk out of my sanity. But it is giving me an excuse to read Illiad and Odyssey and Aenied among other things/philosophers/plays/etc etc. So it's a very love-hate relationship class, I have to say.

And that's all! I moved out of Wyview and now I live at Roman Gardens Apts - somewhere near Golds Gym in Provo. I think everyone in my complex thinks I'm inactive because everyone's really friendly and I've only been to church once (with homecomings, farewells, and other such) with this ward. But I'm going again today, so we'll see how that goes...

And life is pretty much the best ever. :) I love school, I love work, I love my family/friends, I love where I live, and I love the opportunity to be at this campus. No complaints.

(How was THAT for Zoobism, Logan?)